Welcome to Motherhood!

LIfe with 2

2008-11-11T17:08:00.000-08:00

2 girls.........finally............

Our family is complete and I feel complete. I love saying "we have 2 girls". It just never felt right to say "we have 1 daughter"-that just sounded so empty, with the loss of Lauren. But, 2 girls, it sounds and feels right.

We are adjusting. Emily is doing really really good. She loves on her baby sister so much, has to kiss her little head before she goes to bed at night, and tells her all the time how much she loves her.

I have managed to shower every single day since I came home from the hospital. That is just a luxury that I can not give up! Lately, Emily has been coming into our room to inform us that she has crawled out of her crib all by herself and she is ready to start her day. So, I have no choice but to start my day as well, even if it's not even 7am yet. *sigh*

I turn on cartoons, shower, get dressed, hair, make up, go nurse Jessica and we all go downstairs to start our happy day. Today we even made it out of the house by 8:45am to have a pancake breakfast with friends at their home.

Life is good.

Yes, I am exhausted and my hair needs a cut and I have a lot of weight to lose. But, I am happy. I have my wonderful husband and 2 beautiful girls. It's all worth it........

She's here!

2008-10-31T08:05:00.000-07:00

Jessica Anne was born 10/21/08 at 7:44am! She weighed 8 pounds 5 ounces and is 21 inches long

And she is perfect............

The c-section went off without a hitch and our entire experience was amazing. We had 38 visitors during our hospital stay (!) and our house has been buzzing ever since we came home almost a week ago.

Here we are!!

I'll post more details when the house quiets down........... in the mean time, we are all doing great. She is growing and eating so well. In addition, Emily just adores her little sister :-)

Tune in for all the fun details in a few days!

TOMORROW

2008-10-20T14:37:00.000-07:00

Well, it's here.

This time tomorrow, we'll have our little girl in our arms. finally.

We have fought so hard to have her. We were convinced that Emily was going to be an only child.

4 miscarriages and a stillborn birth. The journey has been long

But, here we are. I checked her heartbeat this morning, beating strong at 145. It was time to send back the heart doppler that I have been renting for 7 months. So, I boxed up my little security blanket and DHL came and picked it up today.

I've been pushing my tummy around all day to make sure she is still moving and with us. Boy, I wish I could have enjoyed this pregnancy more.

Unfortunately, I did not experience the pure joy of being pregnant, just because I learned that there are no guarantees. I feel pretty good considering I'll be at the hospital in 12 hours, but still......there is that lingering thought that has been with me since March 1, when we found out we were pregnant once again.

Anyway, this pregnancy has been picture perfect. No set backs. She has been growing above the curve the entire time. She is big and healthy. And we can't wait to meet her.

I'll post pictures when I'm back from the hospital!

She has hair!

2008-10-14T11:09:00.000-07:00

We had our very last ultrasound this morning!

I am a little over 36 weeks and this morning's ultrasound was pretty important. If she had stopped growing or was growing at a slow pace, we would have taken her now. But, she has gained over a pound in just 2 weeks! They are estimating her to be 8 pounds 6 ounces right now.

She didn't let us see her face at all, but that's OK. We'll see her for real in a week. We did see her hair though! It looked like little white spikey things sticking out of her head. Emily had a nice deal of hair, so we'll see how this one comes out.

My mother in law comes in a week from thursday to help out and my mom will be here for a few days while I'm in the hospital as well. I have great neighbors too who will help out a ton if I ask.

Can't wait to introduce her!!

Remembering Special Babies, #3

2008-10-12T15:15:00.000-07:00

First off, the last post.......ya, pregnancy brain. I was not 10 days away. I was like 12. Now, I am 9. Pregnant and Blond equals a not so clear mind, sorry :-)

Anyway, today was our Rembering Special Babies ceremony. If you remember from previous years, this is a wonderful ceremony put on by the hospital where the girls were delivered. It's to honor our babies we have lost. This is our 3rd year attending. This year, on our way, Emily told us we're going to "plant a flower for Lauren". It brings tears to our eyes that she can say her sister's name. She WILL know who Lauren is and we will continue this tradition of Honoring her short little life which only occured inside me.

There are always new people there. This year there were 4 new couples there where their dates were 2008, meaning they lost their baby/infant at some point in the last 10 months. They have no child in their arms. We were "the newbies" 2 years ago, but we were able to hold Emily as we said Lauren's name. It did make it just a little easier.

The ceremony always brings tears to our eyes, especially when we get up in front of everyone and say her name. Her name is like music to our ears. It is such a beautiful name. Lauren Elizabeth Brown. Isn't it a pretty name?

We picked out a pink tulip bulb (Emily wanted to plant a pink flower). So, we dug the hole and Emily dropped the bulb into the hole. We told Lauren how much we miss her and love her and to please continue to look over Emily and her little sister who is expected in just a few days.

Thank you for not forgetting........

10 days and counting...........

2008-10-09T17:02:00.000-07:00

So, we took the tour of the hospital tonight..... we walked in and the lady at the front looked at me and said "so, you ready to have the baby?" I said "oh, nope, just here for the tour" Steve responded with "we'll be back in 10 days" And I thought, 10 days? That can't be right! But it is

This little girl will be here before we know it. I can not believe it's only 10 days away.

Anyway, back to the tour. This hospital. is. gorgeous. I may just want to move in. It's a brand new hospital, just opened in January. The rooms are huge. Each one has 2 plasma televisions, refrigerator, pull out sofa to a queen bed, a desk, and a gorgeous bathroom with inlaid tiles (including glass tiles for decoration). They went all out........ The maternity section has a garden area in the center, where you can take your baby (or just yourself) and sit "outside". Picture an enclosed square with wood chairs and trees, and there is no roof. So cool.......

It was really hard being in the birthing rooms though. That's where I will be hooked up and the baby will be monitored, before the surgery. I'll get my IV there, and just wait for my doctor to arrive. Granted this is a different hospital, but it brought back all the horrible memories of what we found out right before my last c-section, where we discovered Lauren had died. I just wanted to get out of that room so fast. It's going to be a very emotional day, I can already tell. Anyway, the nurses all seem so nice and I think it's going to be a wonderful experience over all.

We took Emily along so she could see where she's going to meet her baby sister. We did see a baby in the nursery which she was pretty excited about. I hope she's just as excited when she realizes that her baby sister is actually a real live person who will be coming home with us :-)

That's all for now.... I'll try to get one more post in before 10/21!

36 WILL be a good year!

2008-10-01T18:18:00.000-07:00

Well, I celebrated a birthday last week. Birthdays never seem to bother me. I have only had one bad birthday that I can remember, and that's it......... This year was wonderful

Emily came into the bedroom in the morning and said "happy birthday mommy!" Yes, my heart melted. What a way to start the day.

Then, As I was drinking my coffee which my husband makes for me every morning, he walks in with my birthday present-a DYSON! I was so so excited! Those are really expensive, so I would never have asked for one (especially 2 weeks after having granite counters installed), but he went out and got one! I'm not sure who was more excited, me or him. He had it out of the box and put together in less than 10 minutes!

We then went and got my new license (at 34 weeks pregnant...nice...) and then went and got me a new phone! I no longer have a 4 year old hand me down phone which my daughter threw in the toilet last summer! I love it. IT has a full typing keyboard and I can even check my email. I know, I am SO behind the times...... but, I'm here, finally!

WE ended the night with a delicious steak dinner piled with crabmeat-SO good!!!

Now, onto the important stuff....... I had my 34 week ultrasound today. I think I'm going to have a big baby. She is already 7 pounds 4 ounces. This was a really detailed ultrasound so they are pretty accurate with their measurements. SO, I maybe having close to a 8.5 pound baby in 3 weeks which I am absolutely thrilled about. She looks great. I am starting to let myself get really excited about this baby.

So, all in all, been a great first week as a 36 year old in my "advanced maternal age". bleh....... I can still make babies like i'm in my 20's!

Anyway, I'll post pictures in another post, just wanted to get this update out.

HAPPY FALL!! it's finally here!

In search of the perfect steak. Seriously?! Ike is here!

2008-09-16T12:36:00.000-07:00

So, we have had it planned for a few months. My mom turned the big 7-0 on Friday and my sister and I planned to take her to Smith & Wollensky for an amazing steak dinner. So, on Sunday, Beth drives over from Dayton and we go to pick up our mom who lives just 4 miles away.

Beth "It's a little windy"

me "ya, gosh, probably like 50 mph atleast!"

Beth "Oh well, let's go, we have 5pm reservations"

So, we pick mom up and head out to S&W. We order our delicious crab and shrimp appetizers, they order wine (I drink tap water.........) and as we put in our orders for Filet Mignon, oscar style, the lights go out. Great. Waitress says kitchen is on hold. It might be a while. So, we sit for a few minutes, Beth and Mom finish their wine and waitress says kitchen is being evacuated and no more hot food. well, crap. So much for the perfect steak. We get our check (she only charges us for the crab-bonus!) and we head out

There is another amazing steak place, Hyde Park. It's dark. So, we try Cameron's. phones are out. We try Tucci's. dark. Well, crap.....

Maybe I'll add in that it's a tad more than a "little windy". Both hands are on the steering wheel, not many cars on the road, are we are dodging, no kidding, 8 foot tumbleweed piles flying across the highway compiling of sticks, leaves and probably small household animals. We are also seeing HUGE trees knocked down (like 50 ft trees), fences, swingsets, etc....... BUT, gosh darnit, we are going to eat a good meal-Beth and I were both given permission by our keepers, er, husbands, to have a "good time"!

Anyway, we finally find that one restaurant that is still open! Seafood-OK, not the perfect steak, but it will do..... We have a great dinner (crab and shrimp stuffed fish) and bang bang shrimp. We have a hard time hearing each other from the howling of the wind, but have a great time.

Come home......no power....... great....... I head to bed and Steve heads to a friends house who has power to watch the Steelers game (I know, I DO deserve wife of the year award!!).

Here is what I wake up to:

Wind Storm: 1, Patio table: 0

Oh well, I have wanted a new patio set for a while anyway..........

We also find out that while we were on the search for the perfect steak, we were getting hit with remnants of Ike, who was pelting us with 75 mph winds (F1 hurricane strength). Only us...... We got off easy though. We only had loss of power for 12 hours. I feel so bad for those poor people in TX who may go weeks. Our thoughts sure are with you!

Summer is over

2008-09-05T19:03:00.000-07:00

So, after spending a wonderful 15 days up at our cabins on a lake in Michigan, there is always work that needs to be done. It's so worth it.........

We spent 6 days up at Silver Lake closing down all the cabins. Even though the corn and peaches are at their peak right now, summer is over as we know it up at our summer homes. We always spend Labor day closing down the 4 cabins. It's sort of sad, but we know we'll be back.

I was sort of helpful, but being 30 weeks pregnant, I couldn't do too much! We did spend one lovely sunset evening at Lake Michigan though.. We definitely squeeze in play time in between all the hard work. I'd love to share the pictures.......

On a sunset cruise on Silver Lake

Lake Michigan sunset.... having some fun with Emily (me 30 weeks pregnant!)

Emily playing in the sand

Rock star in the works....... has goldfish, will party!

Daddy and his daughter........ It was a great weekend all in all. Draining all the water, taking inventory of all utensils and pots/pans, cleaning and bagging lamps, cleaning refrigerators, painting, trimming, cleaning toasters and coffee pots (sounds like a blast, huh?) Well, actually-when all our families are up there, it's a pretty good time!

We sure do miss it come Fall and Spring, but we know it will be waiting for us next summer..... Thanks for all the great memories this past summer.

Block Party Fun

2008-08-20T19:25:00.000-07:00

Ever since we moved into our wonderful neighborhood, Steve and I have pretty much been in charge of all the social events. We moved in, childless, so we had the time. Now, well, it's just expected-and we have fun.

Last weekend was our neighborhood block party. Had a decent turnout with about 70 people. The weather was gorgeous and the party turned into another fun night around our firepit (which is a very cool 16' patio with a stone circle firepit in the middle-we have fit 18 people around it!).

Anyway, wanted to share some fun pictures from the block party. Two neighbor girls set up a face painting station and Emily had a ball getting painted! Showcasing their artwork:

Emily getting worked on by the artists!

Note the "i" is dotted with a diamond :-)

showing off her arms (rainbow, kitty, ice cream cone, flower, butterfly)

Emily with her "friends" (and showcasing her kitty cat face)

My awesome husband grilling up the best brats this side of the mississippi
It was a really fun day!

I had another ultrasound last week. Steve was out of town , so my sister came with me. It was alot of fun introducing her to her neice :-) Baby is already over 3 pounds and her length is off the charts. I hope she continues to stay on the big side since we'll be meeting her at 37 weeks. I am feeling great. This pregnancy is a piece of cake compared to my last one. 2 babies, compared to 1? no comparison. No real swelling, not the pain that I had before, no sciatic pain, I can still sleep in our bed.......it's all good.

I will also have 3 more ultrasounds between 31 and 37 weeks. Whatever it takes to meet this little girl and bring her home.

Oh ya, we had a birthday too!

2008-08-07T16:44:00.000-07:00

Wow...... talk about pregnancy brain! Emily turned 2!!!! I totally forgot to post about that. I guess leaving just 3 days after her birthday had something to do with it.

We had a nice little family celebration here with the 3 of us. Emily opened up some presents and then we headed to the pool for the afternoon (same as last year). We also released a purple balloon in honor and memory of our daughter Lauren. As the balloon was going into the air, Emily said "have fun Lauren". I'm sure she is looking down on us and so proud of her sister :-)

This year was definitely easier than last year. I did have a good cry, but didn't cry for days. Time definitely helps. I don't feel the intensity of the pain as I used to. It still hurts-I went to a meeting yesterday and one of the ladies had twin girls there. Don't think I'll be joining that committee. I'm just not there......

Anyway, here are just a few pictures of us celebrating her 2nd birthday.

Back from Vacation.........

2008-08-06T19:32:00.000-07:00

Sorry it's been a while........ We headed up to our summer lake house in Michigan for 2 weeks and it's been a whirlwind since we returned. Laundry, shopping, doctors appointments and play groups will fill a calendar quickly!

We had a great time. The 3 of us stayed in our own cabin for a week, then Em and I moved in with my mom while Steve came back to Ohio to work. He then joined us for the last weekend to take us home.

The weather was gorgeous and the lake was warm enough for us all to swim. Not that cold weather would have bothered Emily one bit (she took a nice long dip in the 54 degree Atlantic Ocean back in May). We had a ball playing in the sand, jumping into the lake, eating as many blueberries we could handle and gazing at the millions of brilliant stars that are showcased in the beautiful Western Michigan sky.

On the pregnancy front, I am feeling great. I guess I am around 7 months. It's funny, with the last pregnancy, I knew to the day how far along I was. Today, I met with an Endocronologist and she asked how far along I was. My answer "oh gosh.......maybe around 26-27 weeks?" Oh well-we get busy and just have that October 20th date in our head. That's the important one.

We do need to get started on the nursery though. Steve took the bed out and that's as far as we have gotten. I still have, what, 11 weeks or so? Guess I should start to work on it.

Emily is doing great. She loves the water more than any baby I have ever met. She was pretty much in the water, or in her tent sleeping for 2 straight weeks. The girl has no fear either. She just runs into the water full speed and belly flops in! It was so much fun to see...........

Wanna see a few pictures? Here we go.............

Batter Up!

2008-06-30T16:54:00.000-07:00

Emily experienced her first baseball game over the weekend! Steve entertained 72 people at the Toledo Mud*hens game on Friday night. Em was quite a trooper. Her bedtime is 7:00 and the game didn't even start until 7:00! She made it through the fireworks display which ended around 10:30pm. Here's a picture of her (check it out-she even has a little VIP bracelet!)

and here she is meeting the scary "chicken" She didn't cry, just didn't want to get to close to it! Check out the look on her face.......

As for me, baby girl and I are doing just fine. I am about 5.5 months along. I feel her all the time and she is still growing right on schedule. I have a ton of energy and am really enjoying the summer (as well as my O'douls!!).

As always, thanks for looking!

Proud mother moment.........

2008-06-20T17:00:00.001-07:00

And nope, this post is not about Emily (even though she makes me very proud!) This post is about my other 1,000 children.......my daisys-who apparently take steriods when I am not looking.

They have absolutely exploded this year! They tower over Emily and as you can see in another picture, they are 1/2 the height of one of our pine trees! I did one shot of miracle-gro but that's it!

Enjoy the pictures.........they are just gorgeous!!! They put a smile on my face every morning!

and then some pictures of our butterfly garden......dedicated to all our babies up in heaven.

This is our cool firepit that we had built last summer. We LOVE it!!

And finally, the queen bee, herself....... happy as usual!Thanks for lookin'!

Emily's going to have a baby sister!

2008-06-18T16:55:00.000-07:00

We found out yesterday that It's a GIRL! We are so excited and thrilled about the news. She looks great. She is 2 oz above the 95th percentile and is perfect.

Ultrasounds now a days are amazing. We saw her fingers, her toes, her brain, her heart, her kidneys and her lenses (yup, in her eye sockets!). She is 13 oz (1 oz bigger than a can of beer according to my dad!).

Sorry......... you won't hear the name until October 20th :-)

Emily is finally going to have that sister.......... I think someone up above had a hand in this.

here comes trouble.........

2008-06-11T11:52:00.000-07:00

This was my t-shirt when I was 6..... I think we have a little namesake on our hands :-)

Ahhh..... the joys of summer!

Book Review: Field Work

2008-06-09T17:35:00.000-07:00

I'm in a book club..... so I figured I would start rating some of my books here on the blog! I have read some amazing books in the club including: Broken For You, Thousand Splended Suns, Glass Castle, 19 Minutes (that was OK) and then this book. Field Work. I gave it on Goodreads dot com 2 stars out of 5. It is a Fiction book which tended to read like a non-fiction account of the author who lives in Thailand with his wife and becomes obsessed with athe life of a woman anthropolist. She lives with the Dyalo Tribe and ends up murdering a Missionary and eventually kills herself in jail by eating a ball of Opium. Sounds good right? Well.......it is time I will never get back. Here is my review:

This was a hard one to get through. The only reason I did finish it was due to this being a book club book. While the topic was interesting, the writer poured in so many unnecessary (in my opinion) details and characters. There were so many, I ended up not getting to know any of them, and thus, not caring about any of them. Intriguing that he created this whole Dyalo Culture in his mind-it definitely could have been non-fiction. I am just not interested in this subject at all, and the "murder mystery and sexual taboos" just didn't do it for me...... I had to agree with the authors notes from the editor. In places while editing, the Editor would write "SNOOZER" over certain paragraphs. Apparently the author decided to keep those Paragraphs in.........

no wonder I'm craving soda.........

2008-06-03T12:06:00.000-07:00

If you don't know, we are happily expecting baby #2 in the Fall!

Looking up "what's happening in week 18" I found out that baby is the size of a soda (pop if you're from where I'm from) can. Pretty cool. I've felt it a couple times which is amazing.

This is not my first pregnancy, but the whole process still amazes me, what a miracle.

So far so good. We would like to fast forward to October though and just bring this little one home. It's going to get more and more stressful as we get closer to the due date. I am officially due in November, but my doctor is going to take me only to 37 weeks. He won't take me further than when we lost our daughter. I'm relieved that he is compassionate as well as an incredible doctor.

More updates to follow!

Vacation is supposed to relax you I thought!

2008-05-29T16:41:00.001-07:00

Well, we came back more exhausted than when we left! The 3 of us headed East for a few days. Well, 11 to be exactly. We had such a great time. We started out with an 8 hour trip to PA where I met one of my friends and her family. It was so nice to finally meet in person! Kir-your boys are amazing!!!! Then, we headed up to CT to see the inlaws in Fairfield. Then, down to PA to see inlaws in Downingtown, then down to see the inlaw (parents) in Bethany Beach DE.

Thank God we have a company car, so thanks to Steve's job and company, all the gas was free. If we would have had to pay, I'd be back working :-) It's up over $4 in CT. What a mess..........
Anyway, Emily travelled like a charm.

I do have to admit, I was "that person" who said "I will never have a dvd player in my car! My child will read books and draw and entertain herself for 10 hours in the car". Guess what we bought? yup! We are now the proud owners of our very own travel dvd player. Emily was introduced to the wonderful world of cartoons. (not bad at the age of 22 months). I think she watched that movie that has a fairy tale ending (you know, with the pumpkins and mice and horrible sisters) approximately 17 times in the car. She loved it. Opened up a whole new world to her!

She slept great. She is too big for a pack and play so I bought a kid*co pea*pod travel tent. She loved it. Yeah for having a child who loves to be confined and "cozy" when she sleeps.

Other than that, I am not swamped with tons of laundry, grocery shopping and of course, we smashed into this week to redo our front yard (we only got back tuesday). It looks great though and Steve is a trooper for pulling out those awful bushes.

Some highlights of the trip:
Eating pizza at Mystic Pizza (yup, where the movie originated from!)
Eating REAL cheese steaks in Philly
Eating tasty K*akes in Philly
Cape May
The Beach
Watching my daughter run full speed ahead into 57 degree Atlantic ocean water
repeat above about 8 times! no kidding!
Here are some pictures from our great trip.............

The girls :-)

Watching the ferry come into port at Cape May
Very busy :-)
Daddy and his little girl........
what an idiot........
the family!

At Mystic Seaport

Of course, had to eat there!
Yup, LIFE IS GOOD!
Showing G-ma her sea shells
A carnival was in town...emily loved watching the swings!

That's it! I'm going to bed!

So, are you still there?

2008-05-06T10:29:00.000-07:00

Let's see how many people still actually check in to see if I will ever post again :-) Just leave a quick comment so I know!

I know, I know.......it's been SO long. I don't know why I took a break. Maybe I just needed to take a break. Those winter months are so long and so dark and so depressing. But, now my tulips are in bloom, my iris are starting to bloom and Spring is officially HERE! I love the sunshine-it just changes everyones moods.

Emily is almost 22 months old. She, gosh, well, how do I describe her? Steve and I were talking last night that she has the spunk of 1.5 toddlers. I truly think that Lauren gave her everything she could. She's such a great little girl. She is talking a ton. Can count to 10, by way of 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-7-8- YEAH!!!!! And abc's can be a little challenging. Sometimes she only gets to "G", other times she gets to elemenop and then says YEAH!!!! She's great.......... we look at her and feel so blessed that she is actually ours.

We had an experience last Sunday. She locked us out of my mom's condo. She was inside. We were outside. The Police offered up NO Help (yes, they'll be getting a letter from us). Finally, AAA came out (after Em being in there for almost an hour) and got into my car so I could get my garage door opener to get into my moms garage. What a dilemna...... but, Emily was a trooper. We just had her sing to us and we sang to her. It was all a big game for her.

Other than that, we are just chugging right along. We are opening up the cabins this weekend-I can not wait to get up to Michigan and work! We all need to get our hands dirty, rake some leaves and clean up the place. It's worth it..... the place is amazing. I'll post pictures after the weekend.

If you did check in, thank you. I promise to be better. Now, I'm going outside to get some sun on my face!!

Oh, here she is!!

Don't blink......the weather will change on ya!

2007-12-09T18:36:00.000-08:00

So, here we are, playing with the leaves on a late November day..........

Told ya not to blink.......it's winter in Ohio!!!! (just a few days later)

Gotta love Ohio weather!!

a picture is worth a thousand words.. (or tears)

2007-11-12T18:41:00.000-08:00

Ooh! A fire truck...... what fun!

Ahh...maybe not so much fun....

Not a big fan of the hair dryer.......

all done!

Hope you enjoyed pictures of Emily's 1st haircut!!! (yes, we waited until she was almost 16 months old!

Coming up: Halloween pictures! (yes, we've been a little busy here!)

Graduation Day!

2007-10-23T15:31:00.000-07:00

Today is a banner day. Emily graduated from Bubble Babies! We had our last swim lesson this morning. Dad even came to watch!

As Miss Donna was going around the circle naming off the next appropriate swim lesson class for each baby, she looked at Emily and said "bubble babies!". I looked at her and said "are you sure?" and she said yup! (see blog a few posts back......)

We're getting healthier here on the home front. Been an interesting few weeks to say the least. Did I mention our Windy City trip? Well, in a nutshell, Emily got sick on Michigan ave. Thank Goodness for Baby Gap. We think it's a fluke until she pukes in the Coach store......ya, not good. So, our shopping day on Michigan Ave quickly came to a screeching halt!

My sister did great in the Marathon. They did cancel at around 3 hours due to lack of paramedics and water. She got to mile 18 and had to head to the finish. She did great though. We are so proud of you!

We went to the football game on Saturday and now I have no voice. I am on day 3 of no voice. Not fun. My husband loves it, but that's another story........ :-)

Finally, Emily ended up in the Childrens Urgent care facility last week. Bad reaction to her shots we think. Nothing a little benadryl and motrin didn't cure!

No pictures today...sorry.

Couple of notes:

Emily (my cousin): you are strong and will get through this. I promise.

Kir: your boys are strong, you are strong. Hang in there...... it's all worth it in the end

Laura: You're gonna have a baby soon! Can't wait to meet her!

Remembering Special Babies....... #2

2007-10-14T13:48:00.001-07:00

The second Sunday of every October, the hospital where my girls were born, holds a memorial service for babies who died. We have been invited to this event twice.

There were too many people there who delived their babies still. It's such a sad event. Last year we had Emily in her little infant seat, she was only 3 months old. The hurt was so raw and so new. We cried through the entire ceremony.

Today, we drove up, got Emily out, she walked up into the garden. It's amazing how much can happen in 12 months. Time is an amazing healing tool.

I was OK until the Chaplin then said that if we want to, we can come up to the mic and say our childs name. Then and only then, did the tears start to well up..... Steve and I say Lauren's name all the time. But, again, to say it in front of a bunch of people we don't know, well, makes it real all over again.

So, we were the second family up to the mic. We introduced Emily, told how we lost Emily's twin sister Lauren Elizabeth at birth on July 16, 2006. And that we think about her every single day. We love her and we miss her so much.

I wish we didn't know about this special ceremony remembering special babies. But, here we are. Surrounded by people who have gone though the same thing and are surviving.

We are already looking forward to the coming years. Next year Emily will be able to help plant the tulip bulb in memory of Lauren. And the next year maybe she'll be able to state her twin sisters name into the microphone.

That will be a special day

I thought she was a waterbaby.......

2007-09-25T09:43:00.000-07:00

Swim lessons #1

I'm all excited. I wake up early to take my daily walk (3.5 miles today with my snazzy new jogging stroller with speakers for my i-pod!) in hopes to get Emily down for a nap before her first swim lesson. I want her to be all perky for her swim lesson #1!! Well, no nap. But that's OK.

We get to the Rec Center promptly at 11:15, 15 minutes before lessons. Emily is all excited walking/slipping all the way across the deck to get into the water. So, we both get into the water (which by the way is about 85 degrees....wonderful!!) and get used to swimming again. She is loving it, bopping around, swaying back and forth, climbing up onto me and splashing me, etc.....

Then "miss donna" comes over and does roll call. As she calls out all the names, each little one promptly raises their hand and says "here!". She calls Emily's name........of Course, Emily raises her hand and says "here!" um, well, not really. She sees a rubby ducky at the same time and says "DUCKIEEEEEEEE!" (she obviously spots the pile of rubber duckies) oh well..........

So swim lessons start up and it's pretty obvious that Emily is the youngest in her class by about 8 months. (Which may not seem like alot to you, but you go and compare a 14 month old with a 22 month old and let me know what you think :-)

Miss Donna first asks the kiddos to put this plastic ring in the water and blow bubbles through it. Emily puts it on her head and giggles. Ya, I'm starting to get slightly embarrased by this whole swim lesson thing. Then Miss Donna asks the kiddos to get a rubby ducky, throw it to the edge of the pool then SWIM to the pool edge and get out of the pool. Emily is all excited, she finally gets to hold her "DUCKIEEEEEEEE". Does Miss Donna really expect Emily to throw her prized duck to the edge of the pool and swim to it? Of course she does. So, Emily promptly did what every 14 month old would do. She starts to chew on the rubber ducky. At this point, I have resorted myself to just "play" with emily for the rest of the swim lesson #1 time frame.

Miss Donna then had the kids stand at the pool edge and jump into their respective mother's arms. I decided to just hold emily in my arms and let her chew on her duck.......... Slightly mortified. But, atleast Emily is cute :-)

With about 5 minutes left in the lesson, Miss Donna is doing one more lesson teaching the kids to kick their legs while laying on their back. ya right.......... At that point, Emily spots a beach ball in the pool and starts yelling "BAAAALLLLLL!!!!!!!! BAAAAAALLLLLL!!!!!"

At this point, I'm just getting the "polite smiles" from the fellow mothers whose children are obeying Miss Donna's every instruction.

Thank God swim lessons ended at exactly 12:00. Not that I was staring at the clock the entire time.

Needless to say, next week she'll be enrolled in the "bubble babies" class at 11:00, not the "water babies" 11:30 class!

Stay tuned for an update.........

This used to be an easy thing to do.....

2007-09-17T18:05:00.000-07:00

So, every month, we place Emily next to "Devon" the duck. Devon was a gift from my sister to me my Freshman year of college. He's awesome. Devon was always the last thing packed in my parent's station wagon and my dad would strategically place him "looking" out the back window!

Here is Devon's new task in his yellow stuffed life.......... We place Emily next to Devon to chart her growth. It's been a really fun (and easy) thing to do. Here is a sample............

See how she is just propped up against the duck waiting for her picture to be taken? Well, we decided to keep it going! It's fun! Well........ here is how it went today.

Try #1

Try #2

Try #3

Try #4

Well, this is gonna have to be the keeper!

It was pretty hilarious...... she wanted NOTHING to do with sitting still for us to take a picture. The girl is going going going for all 12 hours that she is up.

Stay tuned for the 15 month photo.............

I'm back

2007-09-13T19:34:00.001-07:00

Wow, it's been a while since I've posted, huh? Lots has been going on here. It's been an amazing summer. We've been spending our days by the pool, walking to the local parks and visiting family at our summer home in Michigan.

Emily is now ONE! We had an amazing birthday party for her and a very nice memorial service for her sister Lauren. It was a pretty emotional day for Steve and me, but with the strength we found in each other and the support of our families, we got through it.

Emily is now walking and talking! She just got up one day at about 12. 5 months and walked across the room! She also has quite the vocabulary. Let's see what I can remember

doggie

duck

tree

mama

daddy (even though I am daddy too to her)

eat

juice

puppy

nite nite

watch "atch"

nummuny (bunny)

She is such a good little girl. So nice and just easy going. She still only has 2 teeth :-) Tonight we gave up her nite time bottle cold turkey and she did great. I'll tell ya-there is something very special about our little girl........

Thanks for coming back..... I promise to keep in touch!

Back from the Eastern Shore

2007-06-02T19:33:00.001-07:00

What a beautiful part of the country! The 3 of us headed out to the East coast early early (like 4:30am early) on a tuesday morning. We landed in Shrewsbury (don't read that wrong...we did drive!!) about 7 hours later and visited with Steve's grandma who is 93. It was a wonderful visit! Emily and Great-Grandma B loved meeting and had a few giggles together! It was a wonderful visit.

We then headed to Bethany Beach, DE. Emily gave her grandma and grandpa big smiles after the 10 hour car trip. What a trooper! We had a wonderful visit in Bethany. We went to the boardwalk at Bethany, then did Cape Henlopen/Lewes and then ended up in Rohoboth on the last day.

Seeing the ocean for the first time.........

Then Saturday came along and the men headed up to the LAX champs game in Baltimore while the women met up in Philly for the weekend. We bonded over wine, cheese and some much needed R & R time together..........

Emily in a baby pool for the first time!

It was a great visit. Long over due! Emily was just a wonderful little traveler. We can't wait to get her up to the Dunes!!

Mother's Day

2007-05-13T18:18:00.000-07:00

With mixed emotions, I say Happy Mother's Day.

This time last year I was carrying my twin girls inside me. I just had my first baby shower and everything was so good.

If my first pregnancy had been successful, I would have an 16 month old. If Lauren were still alive, I would have twin girls to celebrate with. If my last pregnancy were successful, I would be 13 weeks pregnant. Huh......... Mother's Day will always have mixed emotions. Celebrating my child/ren, missing the ones who are in heaven.

I have to say my Mother's Day was wonderful all in all. I was greeted by my amazing husband and my little girl beaming up at me with the biggest smile on her face. Both made my day amazing.

I said a prayer for Lauren in church today. I still mourn her. Everyday. Mother's Day was difficult, but we got through it.

I am a Mother to Twin Girls. Only one I was able to kiss goodnight at bedtime tonight.

Lauren Elizabeth, we miss you and we love you. Thank you for keeping Emily company for 37 weeks. The sparkle in her eyes and the sweet giggle remind me of what you would have been. She is keeping your spirit alive.

Happy Mother's Day to all the mothers out there. And I hope for my friends out there with empty arms, this will be your last Mother's Day without a baby.

Our First Mother's Day......

Well, the laundry WAS done!

2007-04-24T11:29:00.000-07:00

The little stinker.....she was being a little too quiet, so I come into the living room to find this..........

See that smile on her face? So, you know what I did??? ..............

I enjoyed my 10 minutes of peace and let her empty the entire basket :-)

Happy 3 Years!

2007-04-17T12:40:00.000-07:00

I have been married to the love of my life for 3 years today! April 17, 2004 was a beautiful day. The week that lead up to it was not though. It was 39 and raining M-W of that week. And I was dealing with strep throat........ I got 2 shots of penicillin and by Thursday, the temp was rising and I was feeling better. Saturday came around and it was 74 and sunny!

This year, it's been about 30 degrees and raining all week. today, sunny and 60. No matter what, April 17th is always a beautiful day!

I love you Darling!!!

Look what I can do!

2007-04-16T16:28:00.000-07:00

So, our little girl figured it out.......... she is CRAWLING!

It happened officially one day before she turned 9 months. It was so cute. And both Steve and I were here to see it happen! I set her down next to the leap frog toy in the middle of our living room. And, here is where she ended up (note where the leap frog toy is)

So, I had to then take a picture of the "target". (ie: the reason for the crawl)Yup, The DOG!! We were dog sitting last week and Emily was just so intrigued with Skylla, that she learned how to crawl!! We are so thrilled that we agreed to dog sit. :-)

Finally, here is her 9 month picture. She's getting so big!She had her 9 month doctors appointment last week. She weighed in at 18 pounds 14 ounces and length was 28 inches. Weight is in the 50th percentile and length was 65th percentile. She is getting leaner :-)

Other than that, she is starting to really enjoy baby lap time at the library and loves to go to play group every friday to see all her friends.

We had a wonderful Easter with my sister and her family over in Dayton. Emily wore a beautiful Easter dress and had a great time bringing in ALL the compliments in the church nursery.

That's about it for now. Time to go babyproof the house!

Mother Nature is a tease........

2007-04-04T16:39:00.000-07:00

Picture it..... 78 degrees, sun is shining, Emily is out in a onsie (only!) and I am in jeans and a t-shirt. We go to the park, swing, stroll around, come home and play in the grass and take pretty pictures by our Pear Tree.

This morning, wake up to 30 degrees. WHAT?! That is almost a 50 degree difference. I didn't believe the weather man...... but, he was right! My little digital temp thing in my car said 31 today. Nuts.

So, I bundled Emily up in a sweater and blanket, and we went out for Mission: Easter Bunny. I was nervous......... sweating..even though, yes, it was only 32 degrees out at that point. But, she did great. I'll scan the picture with the scary looking Easter Bunny and get that posted.

Here are some new pix of Little Blue Eyes.........

Our Pear tree is in FULL bloom and gorgeous. I hope the freeze doesn't kill them all!

Here she is in her NEW Easter dress which she wore to meet the Easter Bunny! Of course...bunny ears......... What mom didn't do this this year?! HAPPY EASTER!!!!!

oh, in case you are wondering, Mission: Easter Bunny was a success!!

What a day for a parade!

2007-03-27T19:41:00.000-07:00

Emily was in her first official parade ove the weekend. Our subdivision held an easter egg hunt and parade. Em won for best decorated stroller. are we first time parents or what? Poor girl...

She is doing a great job on taking steps while we hold her steady. And from a sitting position, she can twist and get up onto all 4's, She then face plants, but we think she's a week or so away from crawling. Get the baby proofing kit out and ready!

Recovery is pretty much over from my gallbladder surgery. Still tender in the middle, but I'm much better. And the important thing is NO MORE ATTACKS! Yeah!

It's been gorgeous here, so we've been taking lots of trips to the park. She loves the baby swing at the park. We need to plant a 30' tree in our backyard so we can install a baby swing. Easy enough, right?! Here she is enjoying the swing.

That's about it for now. Hope your weather is as nice there as it is here!

Recovering....

2007-03-13T19:27:00.000-07:00

Well, it was quite a week. It started out with something very sad (no need to go into here) which led to me getting my gallbladder taken out quicker than we had expected. So, I called the surgeon and he got me in last Friday! It's typically outpatient, but due to my Factor V and the fact that they had to put a drain (yuck) in, I had to stay overnight. Not Fun. I ended up getting a roommate at 4am. They started to prep the room at 2am. Needless to say, I got more sleep when we first brought Emily home and she was waking up every 2 hours to eat!

But, my gallbladder is out...... it had 100 stones! Can you believe it?! The surgeon was pretty impressed. So, hopefully no more of those awful attacks.

Emily has figured out that she loves to hold onto the spindles on the stairs..............

And we have also taken the infant seat out of her stroller when we take walks. She can now enjoy the world as we are walking (I can't stare down at her, which is hard, but I guess the move had to come at some point......)

And today was such a beautiful day, we took her for a long walk outside and then played in our front yard. She is like a little magnet. At first it was just the 2 of us, then our 2 little neighbor girls came over to see Emily. Then a friend walking her puppy stopped by, then another friend who just came home from work came over. All of a sudden, we had a little party going on, we sent the little girls into the house to get us beers (!) and we enjoyed some nice adult beverages on our front lawn! Can't wait until summer!!

When a home become a house.......

2007-03-05T17:11:00.000-08:00

Usually it's the other way around. But, my childhood home is now a house.

I remember when I was 6 years old, heading to the construction site to see the "new house" being built. We would go over after church and check it out. It was in the middle of a big field. No other houses around, the streets were not paved. It was so much fun. I remember one time I got my pretty church shoes all muddy, but it was still fun. After construction was complete, we moved into this big beautiful house! It became my home and continued to be "home" until I bought a house of my own and made it my "home".. Then, it was my childhood home.

Then came word that my mom was moving to Ohio. So, they started fixing the place up. Repainting my old bedroom, taking down the pretty pink tulip wallpaper in the bathroom, taking down the ugly (sorry mom) wallpaper in the master room, ripping up the carpet, changing out light fixtures, etc......... to get it ready to show. They had to make the transition from a "home" to a "house".

Well, my childhood home sold this past weekend. It sold in about 2.4 seconds. It's strange that different kids will be yelling "IN A MINUTE" down to their parents when dinner is called to be ready. And different kids will be screaming "FINE" when told they can't go to their friends house until homework is completed, and then the sound of a door slamming would follow. I think about a different mom asking her children "so did anything exciting or disgusting happen in school today?" And that different children will run home from school, jump up on the kitchen counter, watch their mom make dinner and tell her all about their day at school. I think about everything that happened in my home. A few special memories:

Getting my big blue bike for my birthday and riding it around the cul-de-sac
Coming home from school and seeing the beautiful rainbow my mom had painted on my bedroom wall. Clouds, a sun and a huge rainbow......it was beautiful.
Celebrating birthdays in the living room with my family and grandparents
Swinging on the swingset that my dad made (this thing was huge-fort and all!)
Getting car keys in my easter basket the year I turned 16
Putting the star on the advent calendar which hung to the right of the food pantry
Sumber parties in the finished basement listening to the 1961 juke box
Reading books to my mom in the basement laundry room as she did laundry
Remembering Junior, our beloved Golden who passed away in his dog house next to our house
Celebrating my sisters 21st birthday in our beautiful backyard. My mom made her this beautiful lamb cake which she accidently dumped onto the family room floor. (blame the beer!)
Being kissed for the first time on the front porch after the homecoming dance
Playing basketball with my dad on the driveway night after night
Late nights finishing up school projects on the dining room table. Mom helping out alot!
Pizza night every Sunday.
My dad building a beautiful blazing fire in the fireplace.
Our entire family almost wiped out Christmas morning due to CO poisoning
Bringing Steve to my childhood home for the first time (I knew I was going to marry him!)
Bringing our daughter to my childhood home. -that was the last time I was "home"

It was a beautiful home. So many amazing memories. A beautiful place to grow up. I hear this family moving in is pretty special. They sure are moving into a special house with thousands of great memories.

I know I have a home of my own now and a family of my own. But, I sure will miss "Tara"

What a fun week...........

2007-02-24T11:18:00.000-08:00

It started out with a girlfriend of mine and I going to see Justi.n Timber.lake in concert. We had a blast. We were obviously in the "upper tier" of the age group there-that is for sure! But we had a great time all in all.

Then Tuesday, Steve's mom flew in! We had a great time. I can't ask for a more wonderful mother in law! Friday we went to see the Chihuly exhibit at the local conservatory. All I can say is WOW. Check out some pictures..............

He is really amazing. It was a glass blown garden and some of the pieces are on permanent exhibit, so we'll be sure to go back and check out the beautiful pieces and of course the gorgeous flowers and trees........

Then we had some excitement. My dad's car was stolen while he was visiting my sister. Thankfully it was recovered hours later with minimal damage. (it's the little red car from the polar express entry).

Followed up by me having a total of 6, yup, 6 attacks this past week which led me to a doctor which led me to an ultrasound which led me to the fact that I need to have my gallbladder taken out! So, hopefully we can have that taken care of within the next 2 weeks.

Thus, the reason why I haven't posted in a week!

Finally here are 2 pictures of our main attraction........ our Little Emily who is now 7 months old!

Let's hope this week is just as fun minus the "excitement"!!

Happy Valentine's Day!

2007-02-14T12:03:00.000-08:00

Rubber Ducky you're the one............

2007-02-12T19:29:00.000-08:00

We love bath time! We definitely have a water baby on our hands! We definitely have to get her into a pool or lake very soon!!

Reading Baby Einstein in the tub!
More Baby Einstein

We had to.............. hehe :-) **punk rock baby**

Working hard with Daddy on the computer
Awww.... sound asleep with her bearThat's all for now......... I'll post pictures of the big snow soon!!!

Sledding!

2007-02-01T15:02:00.000-08:00

We took Emily "sledding" last weekend......... I'm not sure how much fun she had, but we sure had a blast!My mom and dad used to take me for sled rides on this very same sled..........Emily with one of her favorite toys "boing" compliments of Aunt Beth Emily and her favorite big orange toy, morgan

The Polar Express

2007-01-22T10:52:00.000-08:00

Be careful what you wish for, right? Well, we *finally* got 3 inches of snow yesterday!!!! Yippee! But, the timing could not have been worse. It's been an amazingly warm winter here so when my husband, brother in law and dad decided to bring a 26' truck load of stuff from Illinois to Ohio, they figured that last weekend would be fine. Well, they wake up at 5:00am Sunday morning and wake up to snow. They hit, snow, ice, rain, sleet,etc........ here is what they looked like when they finally arrived..............

Pretty crazy, huh? 12 hours later, they arrived here. What should be a 6 hour trip. But in the mean time, I was having fun taking pictures of the beautiful snow fall!Go Bucks!Our back yard

Go Bears!!

Happy 6 month Emily!

2007-01-16T13:14:00.000-08:00

Our little girl was born exactly 6 months ago today! This time 6 months ago we were just staring at her in awe at how absolutely beautiful she was......... days are no different. Steve and I look at each other in amazement that she is ours! She is so loved. We are so blessed. Her stats are: 17 pounds 12 ounces (75th percentile) 26" long (65th percentile). She's doing great :-)

On another note, CONGRATULATIONS TO THE CHIC.AGO BEA.RS!!!! What a game! We were at BWW watching the game. One of Emily's favorite hang outs :-)

Happy 2007!

2007-01-13T09:22:00.000-08:00

Wow, I haven't posted in like 2 weeks...... oops...... not too sure what I have been doing. Let's see.....praying for snow (still have none), depressed about the Bucks, playing with Emily, putting away Christmas stuff and attempting to start reading again. I guess I've been trying to keep busy!

Emily is almost 6 months old. Amazing. Everyone told me how fast time goes by. Wow, were they ever right! She is sitting up pretty well (still needs some assistance) and is eating veggies like crazy! She loves butternut squash, sweet potatoes, carrots, applesauce, green beans and eggplant (I know.... eggplant?!). I am having a fun time making her food too. I spent all day last Saturday chopping, steaming and pureeing veggies. It's not hard at all and is really gratifying! I also made an amazing beef stew that same day. My goal is to make one "really homemade" meal a week for Steve and myself. I'm 2 weeks in and doing pretty good so far!

Anyway, I have some really cute pictures of who else, but Emily to share with you all. Enjoy!

She's getting the hang of sitting up!

Still has to grow into her high chair a bit...........

YUM.... Carrots!!!!not sure how I feel about peas and carrots............

Tiny feet.......... so soft and cuddly.........

THE END!!! :-)

(literally)

Happy New Year!

2006-12-30T14:01:00.000-08:00

So, it's almost 2007. I am happy and sad to leave 2006 behind us. It was full of both heartbreaks and joy.

We had a great Christmas. We hosted again. It is so much fun to have the house full of people and dogs! Except for the dog that ate all the Christmas cookies and spent the better part of the day throwing up all over the house. Oh well...... maybe she'll learn better next year. Doubtful though since she did the same thing 2 years ago! Maybe it's us that needs to learn :-)

Having a baby changes everything. Boy is that the truth. We had so much fun with Emily this year. She had a blast playing with the wrapping paper!

She also had a great time munching on the ear of this adorable caterpillar!

The weather has been so mild here we went to the Zoo to check out the Zoo lights. Amazing. They put up approximately 2 million lights! Emily was bug eyed the entire time.

We had her all bundled up for the experience..........

And here we are as a family, enjoying the lights!

Remember Gumby? Guess who got one for Christmas?!

Well, that's it for now. We hope everyone had a Merry Christmas and we wish all our friends and family a wonderful 2007 full of joy and happiness.

Santa, trees and milestones Oh my!

2006-12-18T17:37:00.000-08:00

It's been a busy few weeks! We have now attended about 6 Christmas parties...... whew.......... I love Christmas season. Except for the fact that it is about 60 degrees out. It is kinda hard to get into the Christmas spirit when we feel like we are in Florida. We are supposed to be all bundled up, running from our cars into the stores, holding our hands up to cover our faces, and then feeling that burning warmth once we finally enter the store. Nope. Not here. I have only brought out my winter coat twice since Thanksgiving. And, I even succomed to marketing pressure and bought a pair of U.ggs! And now I have these fancy shmancy boots that are still nice and clean. They should be stained with salt and snow scum by now :-) oh well....... let's hope that freeze comes soon!

We introduced Emily to Santa last night. She had no idea....... next year will be the hysterically crying picture of her reaching out for us in pure panic. Here is what she did last night........As you can see, she was totally content :-)

She also loves to look at the Christmas tree. Her favorite ornament is a santa with the parachute. She is contstantly reaching for the santa!

Emily is now 5 months old. I think I say this all the time, but time sure does fly. She is such a happy baby! Giggling and smiling constantly! She is now reaching for objects with both hands and is so alert! And once something is in her hands, it goes directly into the mouth! She is checking everything out! She is still loving her rice cereal and oatmeal twice a day. I'll be introducing veggies to her after Christmas.
That's about it for now. I'm heading upstairs to go watch the GRINCH!

Toast the Tree!

2006-12-10T18:44:00.000-08:00

I am proud to announce that I brought a new tradition to our street. See, we live in an awesome neighborhood. Steve and I have been very active and have met a ton of great friends in this neighborhood. So, I decided to put together a "toast the tree" celebration. Wondering what it is? So were our neighbors :-) Basically, I got together 8 couples. We started at house #1 at 7pm sharp. They served an appetizer and a signature drink. Then, they read a toast they made up and we toast the tree! It was so much fun!! So, doing the math in your head......yup, we had a minimum of 8 drinks! Most homes served martinis. wow. I think my favorite was the lemon martini. Tim squeezed 31 lemons yesterday! It is Oprah's legend lemon martini. Oh my god-was it amazing!!!!

I served a hot chocolate bar. Complete with peppermint schnapps, kahlua and Irish Creme. I also did a blue cheese fondue served with crusty white bread and apples. yum! The party started at 7pm and it started to break up at 1:30am!! It was an absolute blast. Here's a picture of the ladies thoroughly enjoying our lemon martini's! I'm in the white sweater. What a blast. We hope that it becomes a tradition on (in our opinion) the BEST street in Ohio!!

Some fun pictures.......

2006-12-02T07:16:00.000-08:00

I like this tree dad!

having fun shopping for trees!

are you serious??

well, I guess it's not *that* bad..... Thank god we're done with that........

finally.........

2006-12-01T19:32:00.000-08:00

I think I have more than like 2 minutes, finally. Is it seriously already December? That means that Christmas is this month. Must. go. shopping. soon. (mentally note in brain dayplanner).

Lots has been going on. Did we talk about the baptism? I think so. OK.....OH. Thanksgiving! So, we packed up the Explorer and headed West. To Naperville. Which is a 6 hour drive. But, of course now that we have a little 4 month old packed away in the back seat, it takes 8 hours. Emily was amazing. She did so well. So well in fact that we are going to go ahead and plan a trip out to Delaware in the Spring. Anyway, back to Thanksgiving. We had a wonderful time visiting with family and friends. We spent a few hours with one of my best friends from College one day, and my best friend from HS the next. We demolished a 23 pound turkey (11 of us) and then did a big family get together on Saturday night where we ate about 14 pizzas. I still managed to lose 1.2 pounds during the holiday weekend. don't ask.

Emily is now 4.5 months old. She is still such a happy baby. She loves bath time, loves her exersaucer (even though her little feet don't even touch the bottom of the saucer), and loves being spoiled, I mean, held by her parents. Oh, we started her on rice cereal yesterday. What an experience! Emily is still eating every 2 hours, so we figured that maybe some cereal mixed into her diet would lengthen the feeding times. She did really well! I'll download the pictures of meal time this weekend. They are pretty funny.

Here she is in her exersaucer:

and after her bath!
Busy weekend this weekend. We have a birthday party tomorrow afternoon with Isaac, one of Emily's little friends. Then we are off for our first Christmas party of the year! We have a babysitter coming, so Steve and I will definitely enjoy this night out. We're going to get all dressed up and act like adults!! I am excited that I won't smell like sour milk all evening and running my fingers through my hair that is crusty from, um, well, you know. Moms, you can relate, right?!

4 months already?

2006-11-20T13:15:00.000-08:00

I am amazed at how fast time flies.......... Emily had her 4 month well baby check up today! She is doing great. She weighed in at an impressive 15 pounds, 8 ounces! She is 24 inches long. So, 80th percentile for height, 90th (gulp) percentile for weight. Little porker...... :-) No scrawny babies here!! She had 3 shots this morning. Thus, she is still sleeping. She has only eaten once today since 10:30. Does that tell you something?

She is getting over a little cold that she caught. We are fighting it with saline spray and one of those bugga sucker thingys. And a cold mist humidifier. She'll be healthy by Thanksgiving if we have anything to say about it!

Here are a few pictures from her 4 month birthday. Enjoy! And, congrats to the Bucks!!! 12-0!

Tagged!!!! Thanks Punken!

2006-11-19T16:15:00.000-08:00

Oops- I was a bit late too...... hehe!!

Ok So I was a bit behind in my blog reading and I appear to have been tagged a few days ago.
So here goes:

9 Weird Things/Habits about Myself
1. I have to sleep with a sheet over me, even if it's like 95 degrees in the bedroom
2. I can't chew gum........ darn tmj
3. I once put a thermometer through my finger in 8th grade science
4. I was hit in the eye with a golfball, 1 inch to the left and I would not be here today
5. My family ended up in the ER one Christmas morning due to CO poisoning.
6. I love Neil Diamond
7. I used to sleep walk as a little girl (freaked my parents out so bad!!)
8. I type words out in my head and I am thinking them (so annoying for me!)
9. My daughter and sister have the same birthday (very special day to share!!)
No I am supposed to tag 10 other blog addicts. OK, I suck. I don't even know how to put in those cool links to do this. So, if anyone wants to tell me how, please do! and I'll tag ya!

more pictures...........

2006-11-14T06:49:00.000-08:00

Emily's cake turned out beautiful. If you notice in the upper right hand corner, we put Lauren's initials in lavendar along with a little butterfly. It turned out really nice (and was delicious!!)
Us, with my parents and sister's family. I unfortunately don't have a picture of Steve's side on my digital camera.......... Steve has two roses, one for Emily and one for Lauren

Exhale..............

2006-11-14T06:32:00.000-08:00

Whew...... what a weekend! Emily is now Baptized! We all had a great time. It started with family #1 arriving Thursday night. Family #2 arrived Friday afternoon along with Family #3. Then my parents arrived Saturday, Family #4 arrived Sunday morning...... then Family #2 left Sunday afternoon, Family #1 left Monday morning, my parents left Monday afternoon, then Family #3 left this morning. Confused yet??!!

We all had a great time. Lots of laughter, lots of food, lots of wine. Sounds like a typical family get together! But the belle of the ball was, of course, Emily! She did so great on Sunday! She wore a family gown that is 105 years old. She slept through the first half of the service and woke up just in time for the sprinkling! She looked beautiful. She loves bathtime, so I'm sure that's what she thought was going to happen!

I have to admit, I was very emotional this weekend. I wasn't supposed to be Christening Emily. I was supposed to be Christening Emily and Lauren. Instead of walking up, Steve and I both having a baby girl in each of our arms, I held Emily, and Steve held onto me.

I was in tears for the first half of the service, but held it together for the actual Christening. How did I do it? I have no idea. I remember how I was when we got married. On the verge of tears (anticipation, nervous, etc.....) I was so worried that I would break down up on that alter, but I made it through! Same thing on Sunday. Somehow, with Steve holding my hand, I made it through. I was drained though as soon as the service was over.

Rev. Wing did a beautiful dedication to Lauren. Told the congregation how Emily was born a twin and Lauren entered heaven way too early. There was even a red rose on the alter for Lauren. It was beautiful.

Then onto the party!! We hosted about 25 people in our house. Lots of food, a beautiful cake, lots of laughter and just great company! By then, my emotions were spent and I really enjoyed myself!!

It was just a wonderful weekend to have everyone here. Enjoy the pictures!!

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!

2006-10-31T12:56:00.000-08:00

Happy Halloween from Emily :-)

I have a brilliant child.........

2006-10-26T06:39:00.000-07:00

So, it's been an exciting week at our house! Emily and I were at a friends house on Tuesday visiting her baby, and Emily giggled at me! It lasted for about 5 seconds, full blown laugh and giggle!! I just about turned inside out. Then, I picked her up and she giggled again!!! Of course, she hasn't done it since............

Then this morning, Steve was doing "tummy time" with Emily. He went into the kitchen, and when he returned, Emily was on her back! She had rolled over!! He yelled up to me that Emily had rolled over. I thought that he had seen it, but he said that he had missed the entire thing! So, of course, we fipped her back onto her tummy and stared at her for 10 minutes. She just did her baby thing and laid there coo'ing. oh well..........

We obviously have a brilliant child, right?! I think she's getting out of her "baby blob" stage and actually starting to do stuff. Ahhh...........the little things in life :-)

What's the saying, "a watched pot never boils?" ............. come on Emily, ROLL OVER!!!

I'm 3 months old!

2006-10-18T06:54:00.000-07:00

Emily is 3 months old! Time flies......... She is now sleeping on average of 10 hours a night (yes, I consider myself very lucky!), naps in the morning and then cat naps through out the day, weighs 14 pounds and is a very happy baby!! She is getting stronger every day. Loves Tummy Time and is starting to think about rolling over. She can do her arm, but doesn't have the hip movement down yet! Here is her 3 month picture.......

Uncle Scott (steve's brother) came to visit us over the weekend! They got along wonderfully! Here they are dressed ready to root on the OSU Buck.eyes who won by the way! We are getting ready for Halloween. I have Emily's costume, you will just have to wait and see what she is going to dress up as :-) She is going to be so darn cute......... let's just hope she puts up with her costume.

No other news here. Pretty boring post I know, but I guess when you have a 3 month old who you just sit around and gaze at all day, there's not much to report-haha!

Turtles!

2006-10-11T13:32:00.000-07:00

Had a little bit of fun with the camera today! Emily tolerated the hat for, oh, about 2 minutes!! Isn't this outfit just the BEST?! I think she was just happy that she was wearing something other than PINK! (it's hard to see, but her sweater has a turtle on it!)

Remembering Special Babies

2006-10-09T19:33:00.000-07:00

Steve and I attended a really special service yesterday. It was held by Riverside Hospital for families who have lost babies. We received an invitation..........

It was a wonderful service held by the Chaplain who helped us our through our loss of Lauren. There were some readings, a song "You Raise me Up" by Josh Grobin, and a prayer. Then, whoever felt comfortable, went up to the microphone. Steve, Emily and I went up. We told everyone that we lost our daughter, Lauren Elizabeth on July 16th 2006. Her twin, Emily, is here with us. And that we love her and miss her very much.

It's one thing to talk to people about "losing a daughter". It's another to get up in front of stranger and say my daughters name and birthdate. It makes it even more real. It was a very emotional day. They gave us tulip bulbs, we planted one in Lauren's memory. A big beautiful purple tulip. They hold this service the second Sunday in October. In a few years, Emily will be able to plant the tulip in Lauren's honor. And even say her name and birthdate. We look forward to that.

We have Lauren's real memorial service coming up soon. I don't know how I will make it through that day. We miss you little girl.............

Look at me!!

2006-10-06T05:47:00.000-07:00

I have been getting requests for some recent pictures...... here ya go!! Emily is going to be 12 weeks on Sunday. She weighs 14 pounds and is such a happy baby! Sleeping on average of 7-9 hours at night and still eating every 2 hours during the day (on the dot I may add.....)

SMILE FOR THE CAMERA!!

Dad just told me I could have anything I wanted!

Go Steelers!!

Thanks for lookin'!!

Thank you........

2006-10-02T06:47:00.000-07:00

You all know who you are............ Thank you so much. It is beautiful. Thank you.

I Love Fall

2006-09-28T19:19:00.000-07:00

I love the Fall. I love all the things that come with Fall. I love the change of weather. I love Football. I love chilly nights sleeping with the windows open. I love the changing of the leaves on the trees before they drop. I love bringing out my fall decorations. I love all the new television shows. I just love Fall.

I survived my 34th birthday. Had a wonderful dinner at Beth's with a delicious chicken casserole and a HOMEMADE carrot cake, my fav! And, Emily slept the entire way home. She is wonderful. Smiling all the time, just loving life. Here she is smiling:

My mom had a great visit here. Steve's mom comes in tomorrow from Delaware. We are looking forward to having her stay with us for 4 days. She probably won't even recognize Emily. She had changed so much.

Other than that, keeping busy. I go to "baby lap sing along time" on Mondays at the Library, to a moms group on Tuesday and Thursday and plan lunches or a shopping outing on the other days. I'm trying not to let the grass grow too long under my feet!

Happy Fall Everyone!!

T.G.I.M.

2006-09-25T17:38:00.000-07:00

Thank God It's Monday............... (ie: the weekend is over) Emily is MUCH better today!! She had a little "episode" from about 7-8, but we put her down and she seems to be doing fine. We have now moved her bedtime up to 8:00.

We do have some exciting news (well, exciting to us!) Little Miss Emily slept for 9.5 hours last night! I was shocked! I woke up at 6:45 and immediately thought something was wrong........ So, I ran into the nursery and she was just waking up! I was excited over 7 hours :-) This is amazing!

My mom is in town, and we're having a wonderful visit. We're all heading to Dayton tomorrow to see my sister and her family for my 30 something birthday. Actually, I consider it celebrating my 21st birthday for the 13th year in a row :-) haha! But this time, only with a glass of wine.

Happy almost Birthday to me!

Crying it Out.

2006-09-24T17:56:00.000-07:00

Does this mean that the mom is supposed to cry it out, or the baby is supposed to cry it out?

It's been a rough weekend................

2 Month Appointment

2006-09-18T17:47:00.000-07:00

Well, I made it though the appointment. Oh, I guess I should say that Emily did too! Poor girl, she had 4 shots this morning! I know the shots are a great thing, but to see her look of pain and tears rolling down her little cheeks just broke my heart! She had 4 little bandaids and has been sleeping for the majority of the day.

She did great all in all. She weighs 13 pounds 2 ounces and is 23 inches tall! She is in the 95th percentile for weight and 75th percentile for height. Perfect baby :-)

She is really smiling at us alot now. I call it today as the official first smily day. She even giggled a little in her bouncy seat before the doctors appointment. I'm so glad she is getting used to her bouncy seat. She loves to listen to the music and watch the bears light up. She is such a joy.

She loves to watch football on our big screen tv (she's watching the steelers right now) and will probably fall asleep soon watching tv (like her mom!)

I'm glad we have a 2 month break before the next set of shots.............

I'll post pictures in the next post :-)

I made it!

2006-09-14T18:11:00.000-07:00

Steve is finally back home! He was gone for 3 days and it was just the 2 of us. Emily did so good! She is continuing to sleep for 6 hours during the night which is just wonderful. We had a busy couple of days..... went to our play group on Tuesday, then to the mall on Wednesday, then to another play group today.

Note to self: it's probably not a good idea to go to the mall every time it rains.......... Boy, did Emily clean up! Who knew there were so many cute girl clothes? Well, I did, but just had a little too much fun shopping for her!

She is officially 12 pounds! I am having to get all her (well, my) favorite clothes out 0-3 becuase they are starting to get too small! And she's not even 2 months! Our little girl is growing. She is almost consistently smiling at us too which just melts our hearts...........

On another note, I'm starting to work on Lauren's memorial service. Boy, will that be a tough one. We're doing it the same day as Emily's baptism. November 12th. I hope God will give me the strength to get through that day. For Emily as well as for Steve.

Buckeyes play again this Saturday. #1 in the country-go bucks! We did have tickets to the game, but sold them. I'm not quite ready to leave Emily for an entire day yet. I know, I know........ I'll have to leave her some day. Maybe when we drop her off at her College (where she will of course have a full ride scholarship-haha!)

Have a great weekend all! I'm going to back to my husband who is HOME!!

Emily at 8 weeks

2006-09-09T09:16:00.000-07:00

Isn't she just the cutest thing? She loves laying on her boppy at tummy time!

She is really starting to smile and Steve even heard her giggle yesterday!!!

AND, we are going on 3, yup 3 nights straight of her sleeping for 6 hours!!! I think I see a trend...........

8 weeks later

2006-09-08T17:26:00.000-07:00

I apologize............just having a rough day......... Katy

P "It was God's will.
"R "How do you know? Are you God?"
R "Oh! So God did this to me?"
R "I prefer to let God whisper His will to me, not you.

"P "Your child is with Jesus, in a better place.
"R "As a mother, there is no better place than in my arms."
R "I still ache to have my child here with me."
R "I am sure he/she is, but it doesn't take away the longing as a parent."
R "That really hurts and I would appreciate it if you would let me come to my own conclusions about my child's afterlife when I am ready to do so."

P "Better now than one month/six months/one year from now."
R "So then that means you love your older child more than your younger child (to those with more than one child)?
R "There is never a "better time" to bury your child."
R "If God came down and told me, Joanne, I am taking your baby. Do you want me to take her life today or one year from now, what do YOU think my response would be???"

P "It's probably better. There might have been something wrong with her/him.
R "If she/he was less than perfect, I would have loved her/him even more."

P "It will make you a stronger person."
R "I would rather be weak and shallow and still have my child, thank you."

P "Everything happens for a reason."
R "Can you list one reason why a baby should die?"
R "Tell it to my broken heart."
R "The death of a child before his/her parent is never reasonable."
** note, Do not say this to someone who is grieving....**

P "At least you have other healthy children."
R "Children are not interchangeable. I have always been grateful for the children I have. That does not mean I should not grieve for what I have lost.
R "My other healthy children have nothing to do with my grief."
R "So if I cut off your thumb you won't miss it because you have four other healthy fingers??P "You're young. You can have another baby."
R "I don't want any baby. I want Lauren!"
R "You don't really think that another baby could take the place of Lauren, do you?"
R "THIS child is special to me. I would never try to replace him/her with another."

P "Aren't you over it yet?" "When are you going to be over it?" "How long are you going to keep talking about this."
R "You get over being laid off from a job, or breaking a leg. You don't ever "get over" the death of your child."
R "Funny how the whole country is given permission to mourn the death of Elvis Presley twenty years after his death. Yet everyone seems intent on forcing me to abandon my child's memory in a few short months."

P "God has a plan for you."
R "That is easy to say when His plan doesn't include your child."

P "You have to be strong."
R "Says who?"
R "I am being strong. Just being here means I am being strong."

P "At least you didn't have to bring him/her home."
R "I would have given anything to have had more time."
R "You are joking, aren't you????"
R "Are you suggesting I loved my baby less because he/she didn't sleep in his/her room?"

6 hours and 2 feet!

2006-09-05T08:37:00.000-07:00

So.... let me explain..............

Miss Emily slept for 6 full hours last night!!! I am so happy and feel so rested :-) Put her down at 11pm and she slept until 5am!

Also, we measured her yesterday (with a craftsman tape measure-hehe) and she is 24"! No wonder her little feet hang out of her sleeping gowns!

I have my moms group today so I'll weigh her. She's gotta be up over 11 pounds by now. She is definitely living up to her nick name "chunky monkey"!! No scrawny babies here.

We had a great labor day weekend. Finally have all our new purchases taken care of. New TV, new couch and new entertainment center. Our money tree is now empty........ :-)

GO BUCKEYES!!

2006-09-02T14:14:00.000-07:00

Today is the home opener for The Ohio State Buckeyes! Look what we did :-)

So, the outfit is a little too big, but that's OK! She's in the spirit of the season!

GO Bucks!!

Football season already??

2006-08-29T13:20:00.000-07:00

We live in Buckeye country. Ohio State. Love the games, fun to watch on television. So fun to watch on television that we just went out and bought a mac daddy television. The players will now be approximately 10 times the size of Emily!

I joined a "new moms group" last week. It is wonderful! About 25 moms with kiddos ranging from 11 days up to 8 months. I love seeing all the babies and hearing all the different experiences moms have with their little ones. I'll definitely make it a point to go every week. It's a guaranteed "out of the house" date atleast every 7 days!!

Emily is still sleeping for 4-5 hours at night, and then up and eating every 2 hours. She definitely has her days and nights straight (yeah!). And the long stretch at night is nice.

So, I had a nightmare that we went to the OSU/Texas game and just left Emily at home. We decided she could fend for herself (yes, she is 6 weeks old). I woke up in a cold sweat and immediately went into the nursery to tell Emily that I love her and would NEVER leave her. This is obviously related to the fact that we just got OSU football tickets for a game and trying to figure out how I can go...... ugh.......... I'm nervous about leaving her.

I had my 6 week pp check up yesterday. All is good with me. Got some more news about Lauren though. Her placenta was 40% covered in fibrins. This is what caused the lack of blood/oxygen to get to her. That plus the clot. I miss her so much. I feel guilty that there is something more we could have done. Even though there really isn't........ I just miss her and want her here.

That's all for now...... Go Buckeyes, Go Steelers, Go Bears, Go Falcons!

Time Flies.........

2006-08-26T09:57:00.000-07:00

Wow, so it's been a week since I have posted? Time flies when you are a new mom, I guess. The Browns have had a good week! I joined a new moms group associated with the hospital where Emily was delivered. There were about 25 moms there with babies ranging from 2.5 weeks up to about 9 months. It was so much fun! I'll definitely be going every week.

Emily is now sleeping on average 4 hours a night! From about 11pm to 3am. It's so nice to get some deep sleep that I haven't had in months. Oh, I weighed her on Tuesday and she is up to 10 pounds!! She was born 7 pounds, 4 ounces, and is 6 weeks old. I think she is eating just fine!

Steve and I went out to dinner twice this past week! Emily did just great! She went with us to pick out a new couch too. She did great. She is still such a good baby and we feel so blessed............ We also think about her twin sister every single day and know she is looking down on her sister and family.

Welcome to my new blog!

2006-08-19T11:19:00.000-07:00

Well, I'm back blogging again after a much needed break. Life as a mom is GOOD. Emily is such a good baby and I feel so blessed to have such a wonderful, healthy little girl. Here she is!

She is such a joy. She is sleeping for about 3.5 hours a night at a time. During the day, she'll nap for about 2 hours and get up to eat, then fall back asleep! That's about it for now! She will be 5 weeks old on Sunday. I'll have lots more to post, but I wanted to get this started...... Lots more to come!