LIfe with 2

2 girls.........finally............

Our family is complete and I feel complete. I love saying "we have 2 girls". It just never felt right to say "we have 1 daughter"-that just sounded so empty, with the loss of Lauren. But, 2 girls, it sounds and feels right.

We are adjusting. Emily is doing really really good. She loves on her baby sister so much, has to kiss her little head before she goes to bed at night, and tells her all the time how much she loves her.

I have managed to shower every single day since I came home from the hospital. That is just a luxury that I can not give up! Lately, Emily has been coming into our room to inform us that she has crawled out of her crib all by herself and she is ready to start her day. So, I have no choice but to start my day as well, even if it's not even 7am yet. *sigh*

I turn on cartoons, shower, get dressed, hair, make up, go nurse Jessica and we all go downstairs to start our happy day. Today we even made it out of the house by 8:45am to have a pancake breakfast with friends at their home.

Life is good.

Yes, I am exhausted and my hair needs a cut and I have a lot of weight to lose. But, I am happy. I have my wonderful husband and 2 beautiful girls. It's all worth it........

She's here!

Jessica Anne was born 10/21/08 at 7:44am! She weighed 8 pounds 5 ounces and is 21 inches long

And she is perfect............

The c-section went off without a hitch and our entire experience was amazing. We had 38 visitors during our hospital stay (!) and our house has been buzzing ever since we came home almost a week ago.

Here we are!!

I'll post more details when the house quiets down........... in the mean time, we are all doing great. She is growing and eating so well. In addition, Emily just adores her little sister :-)

Tune in for all the fun details in a few days!

TOMORROW

Well, it's here.

This time tomorrow, we'll have our little girl in our arms. finally.

We have fought so hard to have her. We were convinced that Emily was going to be an only child.

4 miscarriages and a stillborn birth. The journey has been long

But, here we are. I checked her heartbeat this morning, beating strong at 145. It was time to send back the heart doppler that I have been renting for 7 months. So, I boxed up my little security blanket and DHL came and picked it up today.

I've been pushing my tummy around all day to make sure she is still moving and with us. Boy, I wish I could have enjoyed this pregnancy more.

Unfortunately, I did not experience the pure joy of being pregnant, just because I learned that there are no guarantees. I feel pretty good considering I'll be at the hospital in 12 hours, but still......there is that lingering thought that has been with me since March 1, when we found out we were pregnant once again.

Anyway, this pregnancy has been picture perfect. No set backs. She has been growing above the curve the entire time. She is big and healthy. And we can't wait to meet her.

I'll post pictures when I'm back from the hospital!

She has hair!

We had our very last ultrasound this morning!

I am a little over 36 weeks and this morning's ultrasound was pretty important. If she had stopped growing or was growing at a slow pace, we would have taken her now. But, she has gained over a pound in just 2 weeks! They are estimating her to be 8 pounds 6 ounces right now.

She didn't let us see her face at all, but that's OK. We'll see her for real in a week. We did see her hair though! It looked like little white spikey things sticking out of her head. Emily had a nice deal of hair, so we'll see how this one comes out.

My mother in law comes in a week from thursday to help out and my mom will be here for a few days while I'm in the hospital as well. I have great neighbors too who will help out a ton if I ask.

Can't wait to introduce her!!

Remembering Special Babies, #3

First off, the last post.......ya, pregnancy brain. I was not 10 days away. I was like 12. Now, I am 9. Pregnant and Blond equals a not so clear mind, sorry :-)

Anyway, today was our Rembering Special Babies ceremony. If you remember from previous years, this is a wonderful ceremony put on by the hospital where the girls were delivered. It's to honor our babies we have lost. This is our 3rd year attending. This year, on our way, Emily told us we're going to "plant a flower for Lauren". It brings tears to our eyes that she can say her sister's name. She WILL know who Lauren is and we will continue this tradition of Honoring her short little life which only occured inside me.

There are always new people there. This year there were 4 new couples there where their dates were 2008, meaning they lost their baby/infant at some point in the last 10 months. They have no child in their arms. We were "the newbies" 2 years ago, but we were able to hold Emily as we said Lauren's name. It did make it just a little easier.

The ceremony always brings tears to our eyes, especially when we get up in front of everyone and say her name. Her name is like music to our ears. It is such a beautiful name. Lauren Elizabeth Brown. Isn't it a pretty name?

We picked out a pink tulip bulb (Emily wanted to plant a pink flower). So, we dug the hole and Emily dropped the bulb into the hole. We told Lauren how much we miss her and love her and to please continue to look over Emily and her little sister who is expected in just a few days.

Thank you for not forgetting........

10 days and counting...........

So, we took the tour of the hospital tonight..... we walked in and the lady at the front looked at me and said "so, you ready to have the baby?" I said "oh, nope, just here for the tour" Steve responded with "we'll be back in 10 days" And I thought, 10 days? That can't be right! But it is

This little girl will be here before we know it. I can not believe it's only 10 days away.

Anyway, back to the tour. This hospital. is. gorgeous. I may just want to move in. It's a brand new hospital, just opened in January. The rooms are huge. Each one has 2 plasma televisions, refrigerator, pull out sofa to a queen bed, a desk, and a gorgeous bathroom with inlaid tiles (including glass tiles for decoration). They went all out........ The maternity section has a garden area in the center, where you can take your baby (or just yourself) and sit "outside". Picture an enclosed square with wood chairs and trees, and there is no roof. So cool.......

It was really hard being in the birthing rooms though. That's where I will be hooked up and the baby will be monitored, before the surgery. I'll get my IV there, and just wait for my doctor to arrive. Granted this is a different hospital, but it brought back all the horrible memories of what we found out right before my last c-section, where we discovered Lauren had died. I just wanted to get out of that room so fast. It's going to be a very emotional day, I can already tell. Anyway, the nurses all seem so nice and I think it's going to be a wonderful experience over all.

We took Emily along so she could see where she's going to meet her baby sister. We did see a baby in the nursery which she was pretty excited about. I hope she's just as excited when she realizes that her baby sister is actually a real live person who will be coming home with us :-)

That's all for now.... I'll try to get one more post in before 10/21!

36 WILL be a good year!

Well, I celebrated a birthday last week. Birthdays never seem to bother me. I have only had one bad birthday that I can remember, and that's it......... This year was wonderful

Emily came into the bedroom in the morning and said "happy birthday mommy!" Yes, my heart melted. What a way to start the day.

Then, As I was drinking my coffee which my husband makes for me every morning, he walks in with my birthday present-a DYSON! I was so so excited! Those are really expensive, so I would never have asked for one (especially 2 weeks after having granite counters installed), but he went out and got one! I'm not sure who was more excited, me or him. He had it out of the box and put together in less than 10 minutes!

We then went and got my new license (at 34 weeks pregnant...nice...) and then went and got me a new phone! I no longer have a 4 year old hand me down phone which my daughter threw in the toilet last summer! I love it. IT has a full typing keyboard and I can even check my email. I know, I am SO behind the times...... but, I'm here, finally!

WE ended the night with a delicious steak dinner piled with crabmeat-SO good!!!

Now, onto the important stuff....... I had my 34 week ultrasound today. I think I'm going to have a big baby. She is already 7 pounds 4 ounces. This was a really detailed ultrasound so they are pretty accurate with their measurements. SO, I maybe having close to a 8.5 pound baby in 3 weeks which I am absolutely thrilled about. She looks great. I am starting to let myself get really excited about this baby.

So, all in all, been a great first week as a 36 year old in my "advanced maternal age". bleh....... I can still make babies like i'm in my 20's!

Anyway, I'll post pictures in another post, just wanted to get this update out.

HAPPY FALL!! it's finally here!